One Week, 7 Days, 168 Hours...

Yerp. That was how long its been since my last post on valentine's day. LOL

WARNING. LONG POST AHEAD.

And its been awhile since I slept properly. After my last entry about Super Junior: M, I stayed awake the whole night unable to fall asleep. What else is new rite? I should enrol myself into insomnia anonymous or something.

Is there even such a thing? hmmmm... *ponders*

But anyways, my cousins drove in from Malaysia on Sunday afternoon. Basically, its for them to see me for the last time this yr before I fly back to Australia.

So I was bought rite? Guess wat I did? Especially after being bored at home and pissed off with my grandmother about comiing home late.

I MADE... HAZELNUT CHOCOLATE CHEESECAKE.

Yup the same one that I made when I was in Australia. But this time round, it was PERFECTION. not bad for something made in the wee hours of the morning while being in a bad mood. LOL!

So my cousins came on sunday (14/2) and once again I had difficulty falling asleep! By then, my cheesecake is gone and buried in various people's stomach... And I ended up baking Chocolate Paradise. Its a chocolate cake and its fudgy and extremely rich that it was gone in approximately 8hrs upon completion. LOL!

Monday (15/2) came along.

And once again there was nothing to do. I mean, seriously, CHINESE NEW YEAR IN SINGAPORE? what on earth is open rite? So my cousin, Mawar, came with the intention to shop but to her dismay, I told her nothing's opened.

Me and the rest ended up at Kallang Leisure Park to ice skate. BUT. they rink was temporarily closed coz they wanted to re-iced it so while waiting we ended up in the arcade playing stupid games and creating a crowd. I'm SERIOUS! so we were so caught up in our Para - para dance moves that we didn't realise that an hour has passed and we needed to head to simpang to meet the rest of the family for dinner. BLEARGH~!

and again, we didn't get to ice skate.

Baby and Angah wanted to club but WHAT IS OPEN ON A MONDAY RITE? well if there is something open, please tell me so that I can keep it in mind for future reference. LOL.

So by the time al of us headed home it was about 1230am and we were all munching and watching King Arthur on Channel 5 when someone (i cant remember who) asked if the theatre's open!

Went online, checked and BOOOM! those who were asleep woke up and was ready in 5mins. that's a record breaker pls especially if you all see how leceh they can be each time we wanna go out.

So we head out to Grand Cathay for the 255am showing of Percy Jackson and the lightning thief.

How was it?

It was interesting la... Not bad story line, good looking casts, very harry potter-ish, you know the kind that goes like... GOOD WILL TRIUMPH OVER EVIL *cues inspiring music and lightning bolts* LOL!

Movie ended at about 530-ish and we headed to Kallang Macs for breakfast before heading home at 630am.

Woke up at about 10am on Tuesday, 16/2 coz Mawar still wanted to go shopping for valentine's day rite... Tsk. People now got fiance wat. V-day also cannot miss one. Even tho the poor cousin was dragged out. HMPH!

And we headed home at 3pm and met the family at Pastamania for lunch and they left for Melaka shortly after that.

And surprise, I left with them. It was an impromptu outing la. Very unexpeced.

SO when we reached Melaka about 8pm, headed out for dinner at Dataran Pahlawan at Old Town White Coffee, where Mawar bought me a soft toy!!!! thank you thank you!

and then proceeded to hang out with angah and baby and friends and then the siblings stayed up watching soccer - AC MILAN VS. MAN U. I surrendered at 4am and went to bed. Soccer ended at about 6am for them.

by 10am on Wednesday, 17/2, I was awake coz i wanted to go and do my hair. Since mawar needed to go back to KL on that day, Baby woke up early to drive and accompany me at the salon.

But first we ended up at a new shopping centre, AEON for lunch at Papa John's Pizza. Its not bad la... quite Ok the food. and ended up getting myself a D&G shades which cost about RM1.3k on 30% discount.

So in an attempt to pacify myself, I shall continuously tell myself that I practically made money on the shades. hmmmmmm...

Reached the salon only at about 3pm. and by the time i finished doing my hair it was about 7pm and then I made nano cut her fringe after that we headed to Dataran Pahlawan again to meet up with Angah coz he needed help to choose v-day present for his gf and then I got another soft toy present... FROM ANGAH!! WAHAHAHAHAH... so sweet! i never thought the day would come lor seriously. LOL

Met my aunt and uncle for dinner, headed home at about midnight and headed out to Pure Bar where Angah have already made plans with his friends to club. We reached there at about 130am. Club closes at 230am. Went for supper/breakfast at Hang Tuah Mall. Headed home about 430am and Angah and friends was at home watching soccer!

So I fell asleep with Baby and woke up at 9am on Thursday, 18/2 coz my bus back to singapore was at 11am. Baby decided to come back with me to singapore again with her friend, Hadi coz they wanted to get a bicycle frame. They claimed that Singapore is cheaper. I have no idea. If they say so, then maybe it is! *shrugs*

My uncle was unwell so Angah had to send him back to the hospital at 9am, came home and then send me and baby to Melaka Sentral at 1030 am together with Nano coz she needed to go for tuition and then he headed to his uni library at 12 to do his research for his FYP.

power not? LOL!

the story have yet to end.

So Baby, Hadi and I reached singapore at about 430pm on Thursday. Went to Hadi's relatives house for late lunch, came back to our house and fell aslp. Woke up at 7 or 8pm and headed downstairs for dinner, came home about 10pm and changed and headed out to Zirca. Met Mel there and the 4 of us was having the most interesting clubbing experience... ever.

We left the club at 4am, Friday 19/2, and headed to macs at Liang Court for supper/breakfast and then headed home at about 5-ish...

Woke up at 9am and bathe and woke my cousin up and her friend to get ready and called the bicycle shop. Went to bicycle shop at 1045, got the bicycle frame, called mel at 11am to wake him up coz he needed to meet his friends and then we went home, rest awhile

2pm - left the house to send my cousin to lavendar street coz their bus is at 230pm from Singapore to Melaka. Headed to Sim Lim after that to change my keyboard.

Met Tuti at 430pm at Bugis and passed her some shoes of mine as promised, did a manicure and chit chat, headed to ION after that with her and met Deena at about 7pm. Then three of us went to Far East Plaza for dinner till about 10pm.

Haizad picked me and deena up. Tuti's husband picked her up. Reached home at 1030pm, lay down on my bed and the next thing I knew it was Saturday, 20/2...

I was like... OH SHIT! WTF!

why such a reaction? coz i was supposed to call Mel at midnight to wish him HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

sheesh~ so here goes:

SORRY MEL!

BUT ITS BETTER LATE THAN NEVER!!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!! You're 24. Therefore, you're old. HEH! Thursday at Zirca was just pre-bday k? We'll celebrate again once we're both back in OZ!

Your birthday pressie you wait awhile la hor? LOL!!

take care! dont scrutinize your wrinkles and fine lines! you still look fine. if everything else fails, there's still Dr. Rohan! LOL!!!

Don't hate me! LOVE YA! MUACKS! WAHAHHAHAHAHA

-Dee

As the clock strikes Midnight...

And it reflected the dawn of Valentine's day...

I chanced upon something and fell madly and hopelessly IN LOVE!!

Can you see the hearts floating above my head?

Guess wat I fell in love with?

Yup. this... *points below*

They're a Korean boyband (sub group) SUPER JUNIOR-M that was created specifically for the Chinese market and all their members are of chinese and korean descent.

If I were to have boyfriends like these guys... Want to dress up and go on date also so damn shiok. LOL!

WOOT WOOT~!

Btw,

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR ALL!

Eyes are used for staring

Its been an interesting night.. and this is the first time i'm blogging from my phone. Yes i'm currently using the new motorola dext mb200..

I'm still at the chinese new year dinner and i've been introduced as my mom's daughter.. Obviously. And the constant reaction?

"WAH! Your daughter so big already ah? U sure this is the same one as last time? The one that always run ard with the pigtails ah?"

Me: -.-"

Haiz.. i have no idea what time this is gonna end.. i"m talking to mommy and blogging at the same time..

Nine

Nine:

Dinner tmr which I'm not exactly looking forward for. But I know, I'm the only hope left. The only source of normality he will ever have. The only one who will not be a disappointment.

Eight:

Material things are important to a certain extent i suppose. But I dont really bother about them much.

Seven:

When warmth have its own place and time and sometimes you just hide it away oh so well.

Six:

You wonder if you're in the right frame of mind to still be able to think and feel that way. Many wonder the exact same thing that crosses your mind... Who am I kidding anyways?

Five:

Its really time to change the keyboard... its pissing me off quite badly...

Four:

Something just crossed my mind the other day. Apart was something that have never happened to us before. What if one day it will happen? How will that be? Wouldnt that be the same as losing a limb? Or maybe, it might not be felt at all? Shadows do fade one day too rite?

Three:

Pity? Is that all i've been feeling all these while? Maybe guilt. Or maybe a sense of unconscious loyalty. There have always been something that i've always seen in my head but at the same time i've always known that it will never happen even if i wished otherwise.

Two:

When things in life don't go your way. You just turn oh-so-impatient. you'll turn scared of something that you don't even know anymore. Your faith tend to waiver. Your hope alittle bleak. But you keep on going as tho there is some unknown force pushing you on.

One:

Love comes in many forms. Disappointment comes from love. Only when you love then you'd be able to be disappointed. When you get disappointed, can you give another chance? Another chance at life. Another chance of you being there. Another chance of strength.

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Do cats really have nine lives? If yes, I hope you have the lives of a cat. You're part of my tiger. I just pray that your nine lives have yet to be used up.

I want something different for you. I want a change for everyone. I want you to start over even if it means you'll have to go somewhere else. I want you to live the life that you were supposed to live. I want you to at least have a glimpse of the perfection. Yes, the perfection that this imperfect family can give.

I just hope you'll manage to get out of this one. And I want you to promise me when I see you that this will be the end. This will be the last. This will be just part of your past and a memory you would not want to revisit anymore. I want you to promise me that you'd give the world to the little ones and never let whatever that happened repeat itself in them.

Please.

Just hear the wishes of my heart and make me this promise from a brother to his sister.

Stomach Flu

As many would know from my facebook status updates I was in Jakarta over the weekend. Yes its one of the many random things I've done eversince i cam back from Aussieland. LOL!

If only I could travel for free, you know like... fully sponsored! yippe yum yum. LOL. Yes, no harm rite. A girl can always dream.

Sidetrack: I have a pimple on my nose. Fucking painful.

So I came back on sunday-monday at midnight. And then on tuesday I felt as though I was going to die of stomach pains. It felt like menses cramps only that its all over the tummy instead. So for all you girls out there you can imagine my pain. HMPH!

My doctor was gleeful at the sight of me simply commenting that I should just take this as a FREE DETOXIFICATION.

Free Detoxification? Kns.

Basically, not eating keeps me feeling perfectly fine. the moment i consume something remotely solid and would need digestion, the pain is.. yes. EXCRUCIATING. HMPH!

And its always at times like this that... you tend to have the weirdest cravings. And I am currently craving for MACDONALDS. can you believe it?

bloody hell.

Anyways, I have no photos from Jakarta. Just followed my aunt coz she needed to get some things for her spa. And I bought cheap ass MAC products at the cosmetic centre. Now I'm wondering if I were to sell these make up, think got people will buy?

One MAC blusher at $15. hmmm *ponders*

2010

realised how I didn't exactly welcome the new year in?

1st january was a friday. People always talk about how peaceful and holy fridays can get. Yes, maybe it was the perfect day to welcome the new year.

Many things have changed. If some things will not be changing, I will be a Year 2 student this coming academic year. If some things don't change, I will still be there.

2009 was eventful.

I left for Australia in such a haste that sometimes, I still can't believe I did it. Looking back, the feeling's surreal.

The freedom that came along with living on my own. It was exhilarating. As much as I hate to say it. I love it.

2009 was also a year of many mistakes. Maybe I was in that much of a haste to leave. But I've always been taught to never live in regret. So, I didn't regret it. Coz I learnt so much about myself in the past year.

I grew up. To be a more patient girl then what I was a year back. I'm the same girl that left singapore in early 09, just some enhancement in personality and character have occured.

2010 was welcomed with joy and always something good to remember. The fact that my cousin got engaged. She's lucky. especially to get someone like him. He's a nice man. And he's lucky too... to get someone as fiercely loyal as her.

Some have asked me when's my turn. I don't know actually. There's still so many things to achieve and to look forward to in my life and I think marriage won't be in the list for at list another 7years.

But who am I to say if fate gives me a different direction rite? Marriage is after all god's will. At least I know that as of rite now, i've yet to be match made or found out that I've been betrothed to someone since birth. lol Now that's paparazzi worthy. heh.

With certain glitches aside, 2010 have been somewhat kind so far.

To all my friends who have recently gotten married, CONGRATS!

To everyone else, may this year bring wonderful memories.

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"The trick is to recognize that a goodbye can be a good thing. where it can be a chance to start again."

- Ugly Betty, Season 4 Episode 11

As everyone knew, I failed my politics in year 1 semester 1 and there was no supp papers for that bloody module.

I die die wanted to overload my semester 2 coz well, I WAS SO BLOODY FREE AND I NEEDED THE DAMN MODULE FOR A CLEAN TRANSFER... duh.

So i emailed my bachelor of arts administrator and she told me that I could not overload when i asked her why coz i really needed it, she told me that i have yet to fulfill the necessary 18cu requirement before overloading can be approved. I was like.. WTF.

so this sem, in the midst of all the shit that has been thrown at me since the new year has started, I decided to just choose my bloody modules in case i have to stick in this bloody undergrad program rite.

this sem, i'm only allowed to do 3modules coz each modules is 6credit units coz i'm already doing upper level subjects as i will be graduating from Bachelor of Arts (w/ (hopefully) triple major) end of next yr.

so i actually can put all my classes in one day and be free the rest of the week but i can bet you. when essays come piling in, it will be oh so joyous.

and because of the stupid module i failed last yr, i have to retake one yr 1 module. So i emailed my admin rite. and guess wat she said? she said she is not in charge of overloading requests and she gave me someone who is in charge of it.

And do you know wat else is stated in the request? THERE IS A REQUEST FOR OVERLOADING APPEALS AND SPECIAL CASES. basically, for idiots like me in my situation last semester rite?

THE LEAST SHE COULD DO WAS TO TELL ME THAT. Rite? KNN. KNS. what's the point of having a student advisor when they don't bloody advise at all? fuckers.

They gave me the shittiest offer which I accepted, currently putting me through the shittiest hell hole and isn't really helping me at all.

And you know wat?

All I wanted is that law degree. Is that really too much to ask? I am willing to give my life up for it. People don't understand why I've always wanted to be a lawyer. I have a long list of reasons. Its the only way I can give back.

sometimes, i tell myself, get over it nad. There is other things out there that you can do so well. Yeah. Maybe. Its just a law degree isn't it?

I'm just very put off rite now.

I need coMfort.

CONGRATS

As most of you know, I was in Melaka over the new year weekend coz my cousin was getting engaged....

It was definitely memorable in more than one ways...

once again, Congrats Mawarni!!

Stay good to him hor!!!

So my aunt now is waiting for me to get engaged next before allowing her other children to even consider getting engaged... I just told her that she better allow them to cross whatever line there is coz it will take me a long while before i'm getting engaged. LOL!

The trip was interesting. I think I will be going back there again one day soon before I fly off to australia!! YIPPPPEEEE~~~!!!

I kinda got my way with it. Or so I think.

Anyways, I like it there.

Hate the pollution tho. I still wonder how people survive there. I think they're born with bionic lungs or something. The air is constantly foggy and the sun is practically red there. And it looks as if the sun is looking in on the country, the light had the tunnel effect.

Macau was beautiful. The casinos and all...

Zhu Hai was fashionable. Guangzhou was windy and cheap!

Ok. practically everywhere in China would be cheap for us.

On the highway from Zhu Hai to Guangzhou, all you see is fog and a faint silhoutte of tall furnace towers. And the surrounding is grey. It is just like in those industrial movies! and if you dare to wind down the windows, like I did, you'll smell nothing but burnt plastic! LOL!!

China is a health hazard for someone like me. Asthmatic. Why?

ON TOP OF THE AIR POLLUTION, everyone in Zhu Hai smokes. In the toilet, in the restaurant, in the shopping centre, in the cab, in the hotel room. Its like the entire state smells of cigarette.

everyone stares at me in hopes to strike a conversation asking me if i understand mandarin... my answer was: Yi tian tian (alittle bit) and they stare at me in awe. me: -.-"

then they asked me why is it that i'm from singapore and i dont know how to speak mandarin...

and my answer was... malay-ren, pu tong man-yun. ing-yun only! (Malay, dunno how to speak mandarin. English only)

WAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!

so they are in the opinion that I am beautiful, pretty, good looking, and my eyes are mei ren... which i found out meant amazing. coz i was staring at the sales girl in confusion when this guy came up to me and translated it to me. by the time he finished translating, I was red. By the time he agreed with everything the sales girl said... I could no longer maintain eye contact. LOL!

And yes, I had the moses effect when I was there. I parted the red sea when I enter a shop and it grew quiet and then I will be the only customer with various sales assistant literally standing in my face staring at me. It is actually quite unsettling.

But hey, their compliment actually made me feel good about myself. and seriously, to be complimented by those girls, i was honoured can... They're so good looking. I can't help admiring them lor!

So who am i to complain rite? just grateful and embarrassed.

I bought a panda soft toy... and called it... Post. In memory of a particular cute, grin worthy incident i had in Guangzhou.

If you guys were wondering, Yes, i did try the casinos... and yes, with my mom's permission.

Everytime I'm with them...

I don't need to prove anything.

I never feel shit.

I never been treated like shit.

We talk about everything under the sun. Politics. Travel. Clothes. Porn. Restaurants. Alcohols. Family. Relationships. Movies. Songs. Dance Moves.

They know my moods. But I guess, that's not coz of due to the years of friendship. That's due to the fact that we've been put in a situation together.

With them, I've always been treated right. I've always been taken care off. I've always been bullied but its still different.

With them, they treat me as their equal but still respect me as a girl.

With them, I always feel that there's hope still for the world. LOL.

They're not my cousins. They're not related. But they're like the brothers I never had. They're one of those that I've missed in Australia.

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Fencing competition was shit. I didn't realise that the body wire was spoilt till Matt kept on asking me to test it after each point and then finally he told me to change it. The point was 11 - 2.

Yes. Mine was 2. In a 15 points bout. I wanted to cry by then! I wanted the individual medal so bad! And losing that badly to the opponent i was fencing against, it was... well. an insult.

Guess wat happened immediately after I changed the body wire? The bout ended 30 seconds after I changed my body wire.

I still lost. But guess wat was my points?

yup. the bout was 15-12.

Conclusion: I should have changed my body wire sooner.

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my ankle is beginning to act up again. hmmm...

Turn Around

You know how worried i've been the whole year rite? Because of the pending transfer. Well I received the approval of transfer via email last week! I was shock since my results were not out yet, but i was thrill nevertheless.

My dream is like an arm's length away! Yayness!

Eversince that day, I've been the luckiest idiot around. Apart from small minute things such as dinner reservations or cab bookings, i won a $200 jewelery voucher! lol.. it was so random that voucher!

I have a reason to celebrate the end of this yr! I have yet to do it!

heh.

But i'm beyond happy tho.

i'm just really grateful to everyone who have supported me

and really, thank god.

It was an interesting flight home.

Its been a rather interesting week.

But truthfully, i'm bored.

I was bored 48hrs after reaching home. haiz. I dunno. Sometimes, I don't know what to expect from homecoming.

Sometimes, I don't know how to feel being the only rare one who is not working when everyone already is.

Sometimes, I don't know how to feel being the rare one without a partner when everyone is having a serious one.

I always think to myself that it doesn't matter if I can fend for myself. But sometimes, I can't help thinking that it will be nice to have someone taking care of me 20yrs down the road.

I had my secondary school class gathering. While I know some envy my life, I envy theirs even more. At the end of the day, I'm a girl. I wanna be carefree sometimes. To not worry how my life will turn out to be. I wanna feel as though I can own the world and hop about merrily.

I think I'm allowed to dream, even if its just for that split second.

And then, reality hits and realise that I will not allow anyone to have that power over me. I will have that power over myself.

I am no one's but my own.

And that dream of that girl gets pushed aside into the deepest corners of my mind and heart till it resurface again when events trigger it too.

So, till then. *shrugs*

STARING

staring blankly out the glass walls of Adelaide airport waiting for the Qantas plane to come parking itself in the designated berth.

I'm so damn hungry! When is the plane gonna arrive?!?! I can't wait for my lunch liao! I'm currently regretting the fact that i brought my fencing stuff home coz i can't check it in so i have to put it in the overhead compartment.

Fencing. I miss fencing. A HELL LOT! so maybe i cant regret that much since its not that applicable if you miss it rite? lol

hmmmm....

I can't remember my unit number. which is fantastic.

oh. McSpicy! I'm coming! LOL!

that one is like my closet husband.

OH LOOK! QANTAS PLANE HAVE ARRIVED. THANK GOD. I have no idea what to do already. dying of boredom already pls!

guess what my aunt's cooking today? RENDANG AND KETUPAT! MUAHAHAHHAHAHHA!!

shit. i'm so gonna grow fat. and then after that cannot fit into my kebaya and corset for my cousin's engagement. then i'll be in tshirt and shorts. the most tak glam outfit ever created for mankind. bleargh! and then it will be remembered for my whole life, my cousins' whole life and her fiance's whole life and my future nieces and nephews' whole life!

i'm gonna die.

WAHAHAHAHAHHAHA~

Bottom line: i'm not dramatic. I'm just hungry!

so yes pple, i'm heading home today.

See you guys soon, in a country where the grass is literally greener!

Seriously. No one messes with Nad.

No one.

She obviously think that she can just get away with it. Oh trust me. I may be leaving on Tuesday, but that doesn't mean that hell can't break lose.

She will realise what a selfish, self-centred bitch she is by the time i'm done.

I am the wrong girl to piss off continuously.

EXAMS ARE ENDING!

Tomorrow's my last paper!

Professional English! MUAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!!!

Grammatical errors are gonna make me fail! lol

LESSONS

Its odd really, how one of my most valuable life lessons was learnt when I was lying in bed, witnessing the world spin twice its normal speed and shivering under 2 blankets trying to keep warm on a weekend.

But I would say, nothing is impossible...

Have you ever had flashbacks when you were sick? Either while you were sleeping or when you're awake but you're so dazed that you're more unconscious than conscious?

ya that. I always remember things when I'm sick. Maybe coz only then will my guard be down. Most of them memories that I've kept locked away you know. Maybe some of these memories gives me the strength i need to recover and some just keep me happy while i go through them like an old movie while i'm sick and unable to do anything else anyway.

And these are the things that kept me sane through one of my most upsetting weekends ever.

Why upsetting? Well, it was then that I told myself never to be so sick again that I would need someone's help ever again.

People. People are just sometimes unreliable. Selfish. and mostly they think that the world revolves around them.

And pple ask me why do i find it hard to trust someone. Well its because of that.

For me, friends are not to be taken for granted. That I learnt when I was 11. Friends are those who will stay. Acquaintances are those who stay just because you have the influence, money, brains and desert you when everything goes wrong.

Its funny how A would constantly ask me why I would do almost anything for B. Why is it if I were to ask to choose between A and B. I would definitely choose B.

That's coz, B is someone whom I have grown to trust over the years. Who knows me so well that he doesn't really have to ask much to know what's wrong. B is surprisingly one of the 4 people that i have ever broke down in front of in my entire life. When I mean broke down, like literally grow limp and cry. B have always been there by my side, taking my side or not agreeing with me but still take my side but scold me later on. B is 1 out of 3 person that I could say anything I want, filtered or unfiltered. B checks on me constantly when B knows i'm sick even though there is nothing else B could do. B calls or messages when B realises that its been that long since we last spoke or meet up. B may not be the easiest person to understand but B genuinely cares in B's own way even though he may show it differently.

Unlike A who have countlessly shown over the period of these recent 6 months that she just needs me to be there for her through her problems, sleepless nights, loneliness, adapting, needing to adjust to be independent and have proven to be unable to help when i finally need help, i.e. saturday when i needed to go to the doctor, coz surprise, she was SUDDENLY busy on the day and time agreed upon the previous day.

So does A really wanna know why I would choose B over her? I doubt it.

Coz unlike A, I know how to value my friends. There's 4 people in my life that I would trust my life with and B is one of those people. Beside my mom and these people, B is one of the people who I would stake my life for.

NO CHANGE

didn't think it was worth it. So i'll be arriving as initially planned.

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I hate it how pple always say i'm rich just coz i'm an international student and how i dont have to work hard and not to have a care in the world and i will still receive a monthly allowance.

Truthfully, I feel insulted. Totally insulted.

While I understand where you're coming from, at the same time don't judge me coz i've never judge you alrite. You don't know my current circumstances then don't just give me some flippant remarks just coz you think you know better.

well, if you are persistent that my mom is rich. Then, *shrugs* AMEN. Hopefully, one day she will be.

I would just say that my mom is blessed.

And I am blessed to have her. A single mom singlehandedly supporting both her family back home and me here in Australia.

So yes.

God, thank you. *smiles*

PERSONAL BANKER

My mom has been gleeful eversince she got her new personal banker.

why?

she thinks that he is good looking and a really nice boy.

why is she telling me this?

She can't wait to introduce me to him once i'm back in Singapore.

She say.. Meet one of your criterias already!

Me: What criteria?

Her: He chinese lor!

Me: I DO NOT SPECIFICALLY LOOK FOR CHINESE!

Her: Yeah rite. Anyways, I think he's good looking and he's really nice.

Me: *thinks to self* of course nice la.. my mother his client wat.

Her: If you see him confirm you drool down there. I asked him how old he is yesterday. He say 26. Not bad rite?

Me: -.-"

I seriously dunno what's up lor. And what's wrong with being attracted to Chinese man? I think ok wat. I like their traditional cultures and find me a malay man who would be able to accept me the way someone of a different race could. ha. not easy rite?

Truthfully, if my mom didn't marry my dad. I would definitely already be a Nadira Lim Li Mei or something instead of being the mix that i am now lor! That, I know for a fact. HMPH!

So the women in the maternal side of the family prefers our fairer skinned counterparts. Except for my grandmother. That one in denial. Forever have some remarks, genuine or sarcastic. Sometimes she forget lor, her own father was chinese. bleargh! -.-"

List of Theatre Productions

1. Beauty & the Beast : 25 Nov - 19 Dec 2009
   
   
2. Bedrooms - I would wanna catch the Baba Malay Version if I can be back in time: 25 - 29 Nov 2009 Malay
   
   1 - 6 Dec 2009 English
   
   
3. The Jungle Book: 5 Nov - 13 Dec 2009
   
   
4. Maksim Concert Classique (fine, i know that's not a theatre production, but its Maksim! He's like.. PIANO GOD! *drools*) : 18-19 Nov 2009 OK. NVM I JUST REALISED I WONT BE HOME FOR IT
   
   
5. Menopause The Musical (ITS BACK!!!!): 26-29 Nov 2009
   
   
6. Cat, Lost & Found: 3-5 Dec 2009
   
   
7. Swan Lake: 17-20 Dec 2009
   
   
8. Narnia - The Musical: 20-21 Dec 2009
   
   
9. Chestnuts Does Christmas - Like a Hard Candy Virgin: 28-30 Dec 2009
   
   
10. GREEN DAY CONCERT ON 14 JAN 2010~

THAT'S ALL FOLKS~!

ANNOYED.

I'm as annoyed as annoyed i can get. So, I need to rant.

I currently have ZERO TOLERANCE for the male species that I've categorized as my acquaintances only.

Seriously, WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME!?

goddammit.

WHICH PART OF I HAVE LOTS TO DO BEFORE THE EXAMS IS SO FUCKING DIFFICULT TO UNDERSTAND? WHICH PART OF DON'T BOTHER ME TILL FURTHER NOTICE DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?

Is it my problem that your interests in me seems to be alittle more than the average human being?

So stop being so bloody sensitive when I snap/spit/bite/breathes fire when you so much as say Hi and ask me stupid questions online. Find me another girl who would remotely be in a happy mood to see you online and entertain your stupid questions despite the lack of sleep and having the same life changing exams to sit for; then I will reconsider my attitude towards you.

One thing, the normal male species doesn't seem to understand. I AM NOT LIKE YOUR TYPICAL GIRL THAT YOU MEET EVERY OTHER DAY.

Get used to it.

Cb.

SLEEPLESS NIGHTS

There's tons of things constantly reeling in my mind.

1. My Women Studies Analysis due tomorrow and I'm only halfway through it. I'm just scared that I am not on the right bullshittng track. If you know wat i mean.
   
   
2. The 10 topics that i will have to remember out of the 25 that is gonna appear in my Politics paper on Tuesday next week. Which I have not touched on, coz I thought that Criminal Justice was next Tuesday. Not Politics. Well, at least i realised it sooner.
   
   
3. My entire semester's worth of grades kept on replaying itself in my head, constantly telling my sub conscious mind that I need at least a Credit for the exams to get straight Ds and CRs in my result slip.
   
   
4. My conscious mind telling me to calm down and take things one at a time
   
   
5. Its strange, this fear. But I guess, I want it that bad... *shrugs*
   
   
6. My chest and back... hurts.
   
   
7. I need something to distract me right now but I can't bring myself to have fun coz it keeps on appearing in my head.

As a result?

Tonight.

A night where I can't sleep and I can't do anything coz I'm stumped. At a loss for actions.

And surprise, its already 8.05 am and the sun have been up for ages. And I'm mentally tired but I can't go to sleep and I will be heading to school soon. Since I need to get away from temptation at home such as the bed and story books and well, I do need to finish my Women Studies Analysis inclusive of footnotes. So ya. I need other kind of books.

Haiz.

EXAMS TIMETABLE.

		Date	Day	Start Time	Topic	Title		Duration			Building
		17-11-09	Tuesday	17:45:00	POLI1009	Govt, Business & Society		2:00			Sport Centre
		20-11-09	Friday	13:15:00	CRIM1004	Criminal Justice System		1:30			Sturt Gym
		25-11-09	Wednesday	13:15:00	ENGL1001	Professional English		3:00			Sport Centre

I have no idea why i was under the impression that Criminal Justice Exams is tuesday and not friday.

HAIYO! now i have to kill self after my women studies assignment.

And my paper ends at 8pm on Tuesday!

Callin' U

Just what I need to remind me to have faith. It came at the right time... This is the first time I've heard them... And truthfully, my respect goes straight out to them. *salutes*

I'm callin' U
With all my goals, my very soul
Ain't fallin' through
I'm in need of U
The trust in my faith
My tears and my ways is drowning so
I cannot always show it
But don't doubt my love

I'm callin' U
With all my time and all my fights
In search for the truth
Tryin'a reach U

See the worth of my sweat
My house and my bed
Am lost in sleep
I will not be false in who I am
As long as I breathe

Oh, no, no
I don't need nobody
& I don't feel nobody
I don't call nobody but U
My One & Only

I don't need nobody
& I don't fear nobody
I don't call nobody but U
all I need in my life

I'm callin' U
When all my joy
And all my love is feelin' good
Cuz it's due to U

See the time of my life
My days and my nights
so it's alright
Cuz at the end of the day
I still got enough for me and my

I'm callin' U
When all my keys
And all my bizz
Runs all so smooth
I'm thankin' U
See the halves in my life
My patience, my wife
With all that I know
Oh, take no more than I deserve
Still need to learn more

Oh, no, no
I don't need nobody
& I don't fear nobody
I don't call nobody but U
My One & Only

I don't need nobody
& I don't fear nobody
I don't call nobody but U
all I need in my life

Our relationship, so complex
Found U while I was headed straight for hell in quest
You have no one to compare to
'Cause when I lie to myself it ain't hidden from U
I guess I'm thankful
Word on the street is U changed me
It shows in my behaviour
Past present future
Lay it all out
Found my call in your house
And let the whole world know what this love is about

Yo te quiero, te extraño, te olvido
Aunque nunca me has faltado, siempre estas conmigo
Por las veces que he fallado y las heridas tan profundas
Mejor tarde que nunca para pedirte mil disculpas
Estoy gritando callado yo te llamo, te escucho, lo intento
De ti yo me alimento
Cuando el aire que respiro es violento y turbulento
Yo te olvido, te llamo, te siento

[Translation:]
I love you, I miss you, I forget you
Even though you never let me down and always are by my side
For all the times I've failed and hurt you deeply
Better later than never to give you a 1000 apologies
I'm shouting silently, callin' you, I'm listening to you, I'm tryin'
You nourish me
When the air that I breathe is violent and turbulent
I'm forgettin' you, I'm callin' you, I'm feelin' you

Oh, no, no
I don't need nobody
& I don't fear nobody
I don't call nobody but U
My One & Only

I don't need nobody
& I don't fear nobody
I don't call nobody but U...

oh, no, no
i don't need nobody
& I don't fear nobody
I don't call nobody but you
MY one and only

I don't need nobody
& i don't fear nobody
I don't call nobody but you
all i need in my life

- Outlandish

COUNTDOWN

Seems as though everyone has begin their countdown for my return. Its 2 days ago when i was talking to deena that I realise I will be leaving here in approximately 3 weeks. yup.

HMMMMMMM...

it will be good to be home i suppose.

Chest Attacks.

Something that is hard to get, is ALWAYS worth it. She says.

I hope as hell she is right. Coz, I haven't been in the right state of mind since.

It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it. It will be worth it.

I'm sure it will be.

.... At least, I hope so.

Conflicted.

At the end of the day, despite everything, it is morally right... isn't it?

Dear All,

Thanks for the birthday presents that arrived yesterday!

It was definitely a pleasant surprise!

I love it all!

The watch, the earrings, the swirly decorative thing and yes lili, the care bear too. Even though, i am not going to bring it around to sch... or am i?

MUAHAHAHHAHAHAHA... LOL

Turning 23

in Adelaide!

was spent with Melvyn, of course!

No words could describe how I felt yesterday! Love the food, the company, the time.

THANK YOU FOR YESTERDAY! *smiles*

Love Always,

Dee

There's one person that i've always taken for granted.

Mawarni.

The one cousin that has always been with me from far. The one cousin that I always have sibling rivalry with. Yes, we're close enough to have such things.

We're so close that we're exactly a year apart from each other.

25th October 1985 & 25th October 1986.

Maybe its because of that, that we're so close. Apart from the fact that we're cousins.

We're the same zodiac sign but we're the direct opposite from each other. The one similarity we have is that we're both fiercely jealous beings and we're both super loyal.

But those are the traits of a scorpion. Yeah.

She never failed to sense if something is wrong. She has always managed to cover for me. She has never failed to tease me about the guys in my life. She has also never failed to make have the urge to claw her eyes out sometimes.

At the end of the day, she is one of the few people that I know that would practically do anything for me. Even though we're currently further from each other then usual, she still makes her presence felt.

Happy Birthday you!

I'll see you soon at the end of the year!

Love you always!

Dear Soulmate,

Thanks for finally coming around. I'm still coughing and my voice is still low but I am generally fine! =) and no I have yet to start studying. Heh.

Hope your list is getting better soon. Well, at least we both know that exams will be getting out of the way one day soon and the list will be therefore be getting shorter. I'm glad the huge red soft toy is keeping you company.

I love you too, soulmate. And I miss you tons as well! But I'll be back home soon. Its less than a mth to my first paper and soon it'll be done and I'll be home!

So till then, take care.

And the music video is the perfect ending to an entry. LOL!

Hey you! Yes, you.

what's going on? Haven't heard from you in ages! well, at least it can be considered ages in our definition.

Read your blog. Hmm, don't tell me things are still not settled? Call me alrite?

-----------------------------------------------

So where am I rite now at 9.39am Australian time (which is 6.39am Singapore Time)? I'm at Politics lecture. MUAHAHAHAHA!!! the first one i've attended this sem! lol!! i'm oh so proud of myself!

Guess what the lecture is talking about? Internet Censorship. You know ah, some topics would be the last on my mind to be catergorized under Politics... But ya...

--------------------------------------------------

Now here I am in the library after Professional English tutorial and the presentation which i was annoyed about on my facebook status. Well, I was bent on doing an individual presentation when one of my group members caught hold of me sometime this week and I agreed on doing the pair work...

But anyways, that's done! YAY YAY! And I have fixed my attendance for English with assignments.. so that is goooooddddddddd~~

*bounces about*

I wanna fix politics attendance tooooooo~

--------------------------------------------------

Exams coming sooooonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn~!

SURPRISE SURPRISE

This is abit weird for me to post up here on my blog... -.-

But since I was too free and instead of studying, I entered this:

http://www.exploremodeling.com/Contest/Faceof_ELF_2010/16060/Nur_Nadira_Zainal.aspx

So... (This is the first time I'm saying this for myself.. it is kinda weird...) VOTE FOR ME k?

WAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!!!

*buries self*

Topman & Topshop...

COMING TO AUSTRALIA!

like... finally.

Glee Episode 7

Is my favouritest episode so far!!! Woot woot~! Something i can relate too i suppose...

'

Love love this song!

I actually love Mercedes's style! Woot woot!

Until Mel told me this just now, "Don't you think Mercedes is looking more and more like you from episode 3 onwards?" I was like.. really?! hmmm...

Exams coming sooooonnnnnn....

Am annoyed with group members.

need to start studying soon...

Cough is killing me.

Truthfully,

I am worried.

I wonder how badly have i screwed this semester up. Not because of assignments i've missed. more like my tutorial attendance.

This semester passed by in a blink. I'm not sure if i can say a blink.. but ya... i dont think I was about to blink and BAM! I'm at week 10 already.

I've missed alot of tutorials, i think.

Coz of assignments and/or waking up late (or not at all) the day after. and yes, finally, falling sick. i've been sick twice this sem. once upon returning from singapore; flu. and then, now; mild asthma.

So yes. I am... quite worried.

Dunno what i'm doing also la.. like.. i'm so busy.. sometimes i cant remember if i attended class or not. ya. -.-"

watever it is... I need to, at least, pass everything... yeah, even though I hate whatever I'm doing rite now. bleargh~

RANDOM-NESS

Its hard finding a friend who understands, what more a boyfriend rite? So stop asking me if i'm attached or not. If there's someone new or not. seriously.

LOL!

hmmm...

I'm currently doing my essays and the last one of the semester!!! I think. hmm

anyways,

the senoritas are having their jalan raye today and I hope its fun! just kinda sad that i couldn't be there tho! *sobs*

I think my cousin is an idiot. I'm serious. If i were there, she most probably already gotten a tight slap from me. And yes, I mean it this time round. I'm pissed off. Yeah. I mean at the end of the day, when you feel as tho you lose everything, you'll still have your pride. Don't ever lose that. Gosh, seriously, woman? Don't tell me, even that I have to tell you?

I seriously dunno she have brains for wat lor sometimes. Yes, I am really really really... pissed.

on other news, I'm just worried how badly have I screwed up this semester. yeah. *HUGE SIGH*

God, help me~

Of Tears & Heartbreaks...

Hope you're feeling better, really.

I don't know what else to say. I think everything have been said and laid out in the open. Its a choice to be made now i suppose. Its always the messiest thing when parents get involved. Trust me, I know.

I've never wish for you to go through all this. Its painful. Yup, really painful.

Everytime you asked me what was it that you have done wrong to receive all this. I have no answer to that. I've asked myself that a thousand time and have yet to reach an answer. How can I give you one? I've looked at the rest of us and have wondered for the umpteenth time what have we done wrong. And for the umpteenth time, I don't have an answer.

I know you do feel envious of others. So do I, even though I don't admit it. But hey, I truly believe that we're currently in whatever situation we are in because we allow ourselves to be put through this. Loyalty should be banned. lol!

I really hope you're alright. It really sucks that you're there and i'm here and its just so difficult to talk.

It really pains me to see you like this. You're worth more than this. I just hope you remember that and not let anyone put you down.

haiz...

-----------------------------------------------------------

I am so tired and lazy to do my essay that I am still stuck on bloody Criminal Justice. Oh god, help me pls! Now is really not the time for me to be sick and tired of school work. Just give me the strength for another 2 mths. If everything all fails, then...

Haiz...

I dunno.

Of Festivities, Happiness and Concerts...

Its the 2nd day of Hari Raya... And guess where am I? Yup, in Australia. Alone.

Its the most unexpected flood of emotions. I miss something. Somehow I dont think that it is home that I miss. Its just the absence of something but I cant seem to put a finger on it.

One thing for sure was that there were many tears from the other side of the webcam when I was talking too on the eve of hari raya and on the day itself.

I wont deny that going through this was hard. It did not help that I was alone. Yup. Of all the promises you forgot, you had to forget the one you made for this period.

On the day of Hari Raya, I couldn't cry. I just stared at the webcam and saw everyone trying to put a brave front for me. These are the things that people at home have told me about Hari Raya this year...

• How my house was quiet on the morning of Hari Raya coz nobody had to wake me up through various abusive measures
  
• How everyone have yet to eat even though it was 1pm Singapore time, coz i wasn't around running through the house going at top volume that I'm hungry.
  
• How my grandmother was still asleep at 1pm coz no one was there to bounce on the bed to wake her up
  
• How they only cooked sambal goreng and rendang coz there isn't anyone to complain about the lack of food...
  
• How my mom was the only one still awake at 4am singapore time on eve of hari raya finishing weaving the ketupats
  
• How my house isn't overfilled with flowers coz i went on a spending spree the day before
  
• How my nieces have decided, it is not hari raya if they don't get to meet their aunt on the first day. -.-" I told them, don't be stupid.
  
• How I found out that Deena still emote more for me then I ever have emoted for myself in the presence of others.
  
• How Deena ended up getting dressed coz I was pestering her on MSN and her dad just shook his head smiling when he saw me waiting on webcam and Deena went to find her Baju Kurung..
  
• How my cousins webcam me when they arrived in Singapore before going out so that they can ask me if their hair is ok... Just the way it always happen everytime i'm back home

And by the time we ended the conversations and closed the webcam, I felt shittier and more miserable then when the day started.

Hari Raya as I have realised meant more to me then some i suppose. Back home, Hari Raya have always felt like another day of festivities. Only till I came here then I realised the things that I've been doing every year for nearly 20years when Hari Raya is around the corner.

The lack thereof was definitely... upsetting.

I definitely miss

• The smell of cookies baking on the weekends when I wake up (it has reached a point where I wake up here and I thought I smell things baking from the kitchen and then I realise.. who the hell is gonna bake in this house other then me?)
  
• Weaving the ketupats on the eve of Hari Raya at high speed and every year my grandmother will get on my nerves (no idea whether on purpose or wat) about her surprise that I know how to weave the ketupats and where on earth i've learnt it from
  
• The smell of home cooked food on the morning of Hari Raya
  
• Disturbing my cats with the veins of the leaves while taking a break from weaving the ketupats
  
• Trying on my Baju Raya again to see if I have lost any weight since.
  
• Trying on the Baju Kurung my aunt makes and constantly going into her room and telling her too big la, lopsided la, cut this, cut that, why like that? till i get chased out of the room by the end of the night...
  
• Going on a spending spree for flowers at the nursery and bringing it home to my mom's annoyance coz I spend so much money on something that will last only a week, tops. And my retort will be, "nice wat. my money my wish ah!!! i cant decide what colour rose and daises I want then you like lillies wat! So I must get it also wat!!" - but seriously, 150 on flowers from nursery is definitely a hell lot of flowers even for my house.
  
• The yearly tradition of running to the tv at 10pm with the coconut leaves in hand on the eve of Hari Raya to plonk myself in front of it and watch Salam Lebaran on Suria.
  
• And then the one thing i miss most would be hearing the takbir rite after breaking fast on the eve of Hari Raya. It has always been humbling hearing it. This year, knowing consciously it was Hari Raya and couldnt hear it at the exact moment was hollow. that's the only way to describe it.

But but.. i think by next year, i'll get used to it.. I will have too.. if i'm not going back. but then again, if every one is in singapore for Hari Raya by the time i start working... I would be on leave and back in Singapore during this period rite? yup yup.

----------------------------------------------------

BTW, I'M NOT GOING FOR BEYONCE'S CONCERT TONIGHT! HMPH!!!! COZ NOBODY IS GONNA GO WITH ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

They said that Beyonce is too expensive! Coz the only tickets left are the Gold class tickets, silver and bronze sold out can. I swear Adelaide can be so weird sometimes, why cheap tickets sold out first also I can't fathom!

HMPH! I sadded lor. You know how much I wanna hear Beyonce sing Halo live? ALOT!

Deena! where you when I need you to go to Beyonce with me? haiz. you confirm will go one rite? haiz.

Glee

This drama series is my new past time apart from Big Bang Theory and the new season of Gossip Girl...

I love love love love their version of Gold Digger as compared to Kanye's original obviously... hmm..

Here it is:



And I think the character Mercedes is such a joy to watch.. And with someone her size, it is surprisingly pleasing to watch her dance. Love love love this scene!! Attitude! You go girl!



Seriously think its something worth watching... People should make more of this kinda bollywood worthy tv series.

High School Musical was a hit.

Now, Glee. *nods*

The vocals in Glee is definitely awesomer then some of HSM.

So yes, I am officially proud to say that I'm a... GLEEK!

-----------------------------------------------------------

Btw, this is totally random but I think Taylor Lautner looks farking hot as Jacob Black in the New Moon trailer. YUMMY!

LOL!

Guess What Arrived This Morning?

Kuih Makmur, Kuih Tart and M&Ms Choc Chips Cookies, Card Raya, Other Miscellaneous stuff and my GREEN PACKETS!!!!!!!!!!

haiz.

Confirm my housemates wondering what on earth is going on back home. Yesterday I received a small package. Today I received an even bigger one... -.-"

THANK YOU

Guess what came in the mail today?

4 Hari Raya Cards from my cousins in Malaysia.

I thought I was gonna be fine. I started grinning from ear to ear. And I opened it, and tears started falling.

I'm gonna miss you guys this Hari Raya.. Do a fashion shoot for me aite? =)

Selamat Hari Raya and Maaf Zahir Batin! Kalau ader terkasar bahasa, tersilap cerita, tersakit hati... Harap dimaafi! *muacks*

RAMADHAN

has ended for me.

YUP YUP!

God i'm so tired and my lower back is aching so bad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

standing and leaning my tummy against something seems to be the best and most comfortable position and I have no idea why!!

I'm like the walking dead... i'm serious! I just say when I think its time to go home, hungry or pee! sheesh.

-----------------------------------------------

btw, is it me? Or are things really awkward between us? And may I know why exactly?

Of Bus Stops and Scenic Walks...

Many would have known by now that I have moved down hill from Eden Hills to St Marys. But I am still unfamiliar with the buses that goes around my area... I know. Sad. But ya.

So there I was fasting and all rite. On Friday was the first time I took the wrong bus. Or was it Last thursday? I think it was last thursday. i was from Marion (its this huge shopping centre in the suburbs) and was waiting for the bus to go home when the bus 213 arrives.

See. I can take any bus that goes along City via goodwood road.

So I took 213 instead. What I didnt realise was that 213 actually goes City Via Goodwood Road and Daws Road. I am staying on Cashel St rite now. SO.

Daws Road is the main road adjacent to cashel st. So you think what's the big deal rite? I can just take 213, stop along daws road and walk home.

So I only realised that it went along Daws Road when I was in the bus, OBVIOUSLY. I stopped and crossed the road and saw on my left No. 1 Cashel St and on my right No. 2 Cashel St and straight ahead is along road through Cashel St.

Wanna know what's my house number? 128.

Yup. Its approximately 3.5km walk to my house. Its a long winding road steadily going uphill. I can't be bothered to wait for the bus that goes in coz I didnt know the timing.

So yes, I was walking. 3.5km all the way home. Hungry and tired and with the need to pee so bad and the grocery bag that was on my shoulder and my books!!! I couldn't take it anymore that I started eating Hungry Jacks that I bought to break my fast with while walking on that ultra long and scenic journey.

So you would think I would have learnt my lesson by then rite?

No. i didn't.

Yesterday, I took F40 back home. The reason why I took this bus is coz i always see the bus passing by everytime I'm climbing up the small hill to take the bus to uni. So I thought, ok. It passes by my house.

What I forgot was that, on the main roads leading into the City, the buses don't stop at every stop. They're what they call here the Transit buses. Where the journey to the city seems to be cut short.

SO yes, it stops at my suburb. only that it stops at Pasadena Shopping Centre. Pasadena Shopping Centre isn't exactly a shopping centre. Its like a building with a huge Foodland in it (Foodland is like NTUC).

And guess how far Pasadena Shopping Centre is from my house? Yes. About 2km.

Half way through my scenic walk home *rolls eyes* i need to pee. Again. Haiz.

So yes.

BUSES HERE CHEAT MY FEELINGS! Cb.

------------------------------------------------

So here I am at the Sturt Campus typing this out whhile waiting for 7plus to go for fencing. yes, I have decided to go for fencing today. After going MIA for about.. 6weeks? yeah. its been that long. Oh well watever la.

Btw, I prefer the Main Campus library than the Sturt Campus one even though there is more couches here as compared to the Main one.

But the comps here lag so bad!!

When Hari Raya Haji comes along...


Ever wondered if those kambings could sing? How they would sound like? I just found the perfect video of singing kambing before getting slaughtered!

The Waitress

I didn't know why I didnt watch the waitress when it was out...

hmm...

It made me cry and laugh all at the same time.. yup really like it.. even though streaming it online was a pain in the ass.. lol!

-------------------------------------------------------

Everyone back home is asking me what am I gonna do or prepare for hari raya... truth is, i don't think I will be doing anything. yup.

I'm not making any festive cookies... Even though I have grudgingly allowed my mom to send me festive cookies.. *shrugs*

Maybe I just wanna survive here without being reminded of Idul Fitri back home.

My nieces are txting me, so are my cousins.

No guys. I wont be home for hari raya. Won't be back for it for the next 5yrs.

What will i be doing instead? I have alot of essays due soon. So yes.. I'll be doing that instead...

PHOTOSHOP.

I MISS YOU!!!!!!

Why? Coz of this, I was looking through one of my blogs... yes i have a few for different purposes - most under same usernames.

I remembered how much I use to take pictures and edit them with exerpt of poems some from mine and others which I've found online.

Then I saw this.

The one picture that made me smile even when i was editting it... =)

Dont you think my cousins are just awesome? LOL!

Hally, Remember this?

You know wat? There are many many things that I wanna say.

But I dont know how to start. yup.

oh wells.

Life has been somewhat interesting for me. Yup. Interesting. *Smiles*

Maybe its coz of fasting month? Coz the same thing happened last yr as well. lol!

One reason why I like being here... (Most Impt, me thinks)

1. I'm grateful for my roots. For the first time since 5yrs, I no longer wish that I was of another religion or race.

At least nobody judges here. I no longer have to look into a person's eyes being able to read the stereotyped hidden beneath and knowing that I have already been judged and concluded before even given a chance.

I don't mind fighting to prove others wrong. Sometimes, its just tiring. Very tiring. I need a break too.

So I guess, this is my break? =)

Whatever it is, at the end of the day, I know that at least someone cares. =)

If I were to...

have Alex Pettyfer's child....

It will look like this!

(came across the site when i was bloghopping)

DONT YOU THINK ITS JUST TOOO CUTE! I most prob wouldn't be able to stop staring at the child. LOL

OR... If i do have his child. I think my son will end up looking like me dont you think? LOL!