The One of A Kind

I just reach home not too long ago...

time check:

its 1230am

and i swear i'm on the verge of tears.

Why cant you just leave me alone? Why cant you just trust me enough? Why do you always have to fucking compare me with some other idiots that even i have no idea of their existence?

Its not everyday that i meet people. Its not everyday that i can forget that there's no one for me to talk to at home in the day. Its not everyday that i can have fun and forget everything.

I'm tired. I'm tired of you getting on my nerves. I'm tired of you saying hurtful things to me.

Do you know that? its not just now, its THE WHOLE DAY! do you know that? I guess you wont know that...

I was on the verge of tears from morning. Thanks to you. I bet you didnt know that as well..

How come you never fail to make me feel as though i'm the stupidest around? How come you never fail to make me feel as though i'm the ugliest being on earth? How come you never fail to make me feel as though i'm the worst creature ever created?

I've always tried and go way out of my way to please you. I no longer question you. I no longer answer back the way i used to. I no longer quarrel with you as though war has broken out in the house.

i've resorted to silence.

But tears still do flow. Just like now as i'm typing this.

Even though i'm used to it. Even though i act as if i dont care.

It still hurts.

Maybe, there are unshed tears behind those smiles. Maybe. Just maybe.