The One of A Kind

Day #2

Its my 2nd full day back in Australia and a calming effect has taken over. I'm back to being able to sleep soundly at night and have dreams.

Dreams.

They're the words of the unconscious mind are they not? They're the words of what have beens, would haves and wat will not. If only they don't exist anymore. Could I survive without it?

I've changed it seemed. I think I'm more bitter about certain aspects of my life now more than ever. Career. Yup. That's the one thing that's making me bitter that even bile seemed sweet.

I want it so much I'm beginning to wonder if I will ever get it. *smiles sadly*

I've been disappointed too many times in this lifetime that I'm afraid to hope anymore. But I'm still so young. I'm only 23 going on 24. I have a whole stretch of events waiting to unfold. OH WELLS.

Fear. The one thing that makes me aware that I'm alive. I'm good at hiding it though... rite?

Secrets. Words hidden, feelings kept, facade displayed like a scene ripped off a play.

and when does it unfold then?

Yeah. When the lights go out, and diamonds appear upon the velvet backdrop.

Then it'll be back to square 1 wont it? Dreams.